Porno-nline & Fundamentalist Christian Dogma Page
Introduction
	Welcome to the net's first page to cater to both hard core pornography and stern Christian fundamentalism. We hope to provide content equally for both dribbling, sweating left handed web site users and unbalanced, bigotted 'pure' Christians who mutter to themselves and see lights in their heads. Or if you're a porn again Christian - welcome to Heaven.
Amateur Pornographer
	I'd like to tell my readers about a saucy incident that happened to me some time ago. I was staying in a hotel late one night and phoned room service for a cup of tea. Soon after, the maid brought it up. As she put it down on the table I guessed she was wearing a bra and knickers! "Would you like anything else, sir?" she asked. "No thank you", I replied and she left. After that - WELL - I was feeling quite hot. So I drank my tea and touched my pants a bit. Have any other readers had similar saucy encounters? The Editor - Amateur Pornographer Magazine.
Christian News
	X Christian Scientists in Utah have successfully sampled Our Lord Jesus' voice by taping a microphone to the head of their leader Rev Ronnie Herbal Pyramid. Using the very latest in 80's technology they have perfected a car that tells you when you've run out of gas and an electronic handkerchief that literally blesses you when you sneeze. Good work, brothers. Oh, they've also got a clown doll that tells you to go out and kill women.
A christian writes

People come up to Me in the street and ask Me "Are you a Christian?", or is it the other way round? anyway it doesn't matter because at least I can tell them "YES I AM" and I have found love in His name and My eyes are shiney and to be honest, I always used to get nightmares about witches and wizards that made Me wet my bed until I discovered Jesus and He made them go away and before I discovered Jesus I was always getting into fights not caring whether I was right or wrong. Now I know I'm right.

I was talking to Jesus in My head the other day about the subject of Pornography and He reckoned there's nothing wrong with a pretty girl showing us what she's got. "Brightens my day up", He said. "But", I asked Him, "Are these women not prostitutes? Should they not be stoned?". "Ahh, My child", He replied, "Of course they are whores, all of them. And I want you to clean the streets for Me". "Ahh!" I said, and I understood. And that is why I'm pure.